Here are some of my reasons to be a stay-at-home mom. I’ve made this decision even before I was pregnant as I’ve decided that being our child’s primary caretaker is important for me. I’ve been a stay-at-home mom for 2 and a half years so far, and I am loving it (on most days)!
I’m sure that many ladies have pondered over the question of whether to be a stay-at-home parent at some point during their marriage, pregnancy, and maternity leave. Whichever decision you choose,
This list serves as a self-reminder for me during those tough days when I sometimes question myself whether did I make the right choice being a stay-at-home mom.
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What Is a Stay-at-Home Mom Called?
A stay-at-home mom is also called a homemaker, housewife, stay-at-home parent, or SAHM for short.
Stay at Home Mom Job Description
If you ask me my definition of the job description of a stay-at-home mom, I am firstly a mother to my child. I also wear other related mom responsibility hats including being a teacher, disciplinarian, cook, cleaner, driver, family’s chief financial officer (CFO), nurse, and also not forgetting I am a wife to my husband.
It can get overwhelming sometimes with so many roles to play, hence I strive to let go of my perfectionism and simply do my best.
Is it Beneficial To Be a Stay-At-Home Mom?
1. No Work-Related Stress or Drama
Going out to work in a corporate environment can be stressful especially if you have an inconsiderate boss from hell who doesn’t understand the responsibilities that a full-time working mom has. Besides that, you can skip out on workplace dramas while trying to climb the corporate ladder.
Being a SAHM means that you have no boss to answer to, except if you count the little ones. You also don’t have to worry about chasing KPIs at work.
However, I don’t discount that being a homemaker can be a stressful job too as child-rearing has its many down moments too. Kids can be uncooperative at times, unwell, and throw huge tantrums. But this doesn’t happen every day and it is more manageable.
2. Easier Morning Routine
Some of my full-time working mom (FTWM) colleagues shared their struggles with me on this. Oh, the challenges they face even before clocking into the office, from waking up their child, getting them ready for the day, serving and cleaning up after breakfast, packing their school lunches, and going through morning rush hour traffic for daycare and work. Just listening to this, I feel tired already.
My morning routine is different every day but generally, it is at a more relaxed pace. As my child is still under one, he stays at home with me as we don’t send him to daycare. I get to wake up naturally without an alarm clock, freshen up, prepare and eat breakfast with my husband and get on with the planned activities of the day with my baby.
3. Simpler Breastfeeding Routine
I’m directly latching my son most of the time and will just need to bring out my boob to feed him when he is hungry. I only pump on an ad-hoc basis if I know I need to leave my baby for a short period of time to go out or run some errands.
For me expressing breast milk is a more time-consuming and tedious process, as it involves extra time pumping, preparing the bottles, and the never-ending task of washing up and sterilizing the breast pump and baby bottles.
Maintaining milk flow and volume is achievable if moms are committed to breastfeeding their children and keeping a regular pump schedule at work. However, one can get busy at work too, especially if the job requires you to commute a lot (this may make finding a suitable place to pump and milk storage harder) or if you often have back-to-back meetings scheduled.
4. No Dress Code
I have the flexibility and freedom to dress however I choose to as a stay-at-home mom. I can go braless and lounge in my pajamas or home clothes (which are way comfier) all day if I want to.
You can say bye-bye to office lady clothes which aren’t the most comfortable clothing to wear.
5. Not Worrying About Work-Life Balance
Managing a household with kids and a work-life can be difficult especially if you don’t have much help. It can be challenging if you are working 2 jobs at the same time, as after your office work ends, you still need to go home and fulfill your mom’s duties. I don’t know about you, but I don’t think I can manage this kind of lifestyle.
I empathize with working moms who need to take time off to care for a sick child or to schedule doctor/dentist appointments during working hours. Other roadblocks you may encounter when being a working mom may include planning and arranging for child care if you need to go outstation for a work trip for a couple of days.
Do Children Benefit From Having a Stay-At-Home Mom?
6. Closer Relationship and Bond With My Child
Being a stay-at-home mom, I am the primary caregiver for my son and the one who spends the most time with him daily. I get to know the little details and his preferences and what makes him tick. We love to spend time together playing, reading, and doing various activities together.
I don’t get a salary for taking care of him, but I do get rewarded with the many smiles, hugs, and kisses which is always a joy.
7. Being There For Their Important Moments
As a first-time parent, I look forward to being there for almost all of my little one’s important milestones. I would like to be there when he utters his first word, takes his first steps, and more.
I can’t wait to cheer him on and celebrate these moments with him as he will only be this little once in his life.
I’m blessed that I get the opportunity to care for my child instead of sending him to daycare. I can’t imagine myself being a busy working mom who only gets to see her child in the early mornings before work, just a short period before their bedtime and on weekends and holidays and leave my precious one to be under the care of a nanny.
Why is Being a Stay-At-Home Mom Important?
8. Our Family Eats Healthier
I love to cook and prepare healthy meal options for our family on most days. Our grocery bill may be slightly higher due to the number of meals we make, but the advantage is it allows us to control what we are eating and drinking.
I get to monitor my son’s food intake. As my little one has just started solids, I’m also enjoying preparing and feeding him new types of foods to enhance his taste buds and see his reaction when he is eating.
Don’t get me wrong, our family also enjoys eating out on certain occasions and having cheat days. On days when I am simply too tired to cook, we opt for food delivery or I’ll ask my husband to pack us some food on his way back from work.
9. Control Over Your Daily Schedule
Take charge of your life and plan your tasks on your own schedule and decide what time you want to start work every morning. You choose your activities for the day, be it planning a playdate for your child, or taking an impromptu short day trip to the park or beach. You get Free naps at work too!
Bonus, there are short pockets of time when my child is soundly sleeping taking his naps where I have some time for myself. This is when I can get chores done around the house, meal-prep for dinner, perform a 5-minute self-care routine, take a bath, or catch up with some entertainment or work. On days when I am too tired, I join my son for a quick shut-eye nap too.
Financial Benefits Of a Stay at Home Mom
10. Save Money
For many families, it makes more financial sense for one partner to be a stay-at-home parent to take care of the kids. This is because childcare fees can be expensive especially if you have a few kids.
Besides that our family saves money in terms of lower gas costs, outside lunches, and office outfits which would otherwise be incurred if mom was working a full-time job.
Being a stay-at-home parent allowed me to explore some stay-at-home mom business ideas and start my own online business so I can contribute financially to our family too. I work on my side hustle and this blog when my baby naps or I wake up early on some mornings to do so.
Reasons Not To Be a Stay-at-Home Mom
1. Mom Duties Never Ends
As a stay-at-home mom, you need to be there almost 24/7. You don’t get to apply for leave from your job from your employer (i.e. your children) unless, of course, you count the short breaks where a babysitter or daddy takes over where mom can take a breather. This can be hard and exhausting for most moms, especially in the early years of their child’s life.
2. It Gets Lonely Sometimes
Parenting at home alone on most days on your own can get lonely at times. On most days, my son and husband are the only humans I see and interact with.
Sometimes I miss those times when I get to socially interact with other adults such as having lunch with my colleagues and a night out with my girlfriends. I compensate for this by spending time with our extended family and church family on the weekends and holidays. I also try to catch up with friends over the phone for a quick chat or have them over at our place for a quick pop-in.
3. You Are Not A Stay At Home Person
I must admit not everyone is suitable to be a stay-at-home parent. I guess it would be tougher if you have an extroverted personality. Be kind to yourself if you have to transition from a career woman to a SAHM as it takes time to adjust to the new lifestyle and role.
I’m a self-confessed introvert who likes to spend time at home with occasional social interactions with others. Hence, I am generally comfortable spending time at home with my son on most days, however, there are times when I need to simply get out of the house for a breather and meet some other people.
4. Your Life Partner Isn’t Supportive of Your Decision
Your husband may want you to work. In some cases, the pressure to be the family’s sole breadwinner may be too burdensome for the husband to bear or too much conflict arises from you being a SAHM.
Discuss with each other to make the best decision for your family at this stage of your life.
5. It Isn’t Viable to Live On One Income
Being a stay home mom means your family lives on your husband’s salary. This may not be a good option for your family if you aren’t willing to cut down your living expenses and make certain adjustments to your lifestyle.
6. You Really Love Your Job and Don’t Want to Quit
Some women really love their job and they excel in it. Hence, they don’t see themselves giving up their career to stay at home. Being a working mom may make them a better mom in the long run.
An alternative you can consider if your boss is on board and your workplace has this option is to take additional unpaid time off work to care for your child when he/she is still a baby.
7. You May Go Crazy
Juggling the many roles of a stay-home parent can drive one crazy with being your own childcare and keeping up with the endless house chores.
Hence, it is important to find some other outlet such as maybe exploring business ideas for stay-at-home moms or reviving hobbies that you may have had before you had kids so you don’t get bored at home.
8. You Develop Low Self-Confidence
Some ladies may lose confidence in themselves especially if they have been a homemaker for a while. Catching up with ex-colleagues who are at the top of the corporate ladder or well-to-do high school friends may also make some mommies feel inferior.
It is important to remind oneself that being a mommy raising happy, secure, and safe human beings is one of the hardest jobs in the world.
9. Feeling Out of Touch With The Rest of The World
Sometimes I feel out of touch with what’s happening with my community and the rest of the world as I am too engrossed in my mommy duties with life revolving mainly around my little one.
I’m afraid that I may lose the skills (for example my technology know-how) that I have learned at the workplace which may get rusty should I decide to return to a corporate job one day.
10. You Didn’t Have a SAHM Mom
You didn’t have a stay-at-home mom model growing up as your mom was a working woman and may have always mentioned to you the importance of a woman having a career of her own and making her own money.
You also don’t see yourself as being a traditional woman who is confined to the home to take care of the kids.
There are many pros to being a stay-at-home mom and also cons to being a stay-at-home parent. Ultimately, you need to decide for yourself which path to choose works best for yourself, your partner, and your children.
Also, know that being a stay-at-home mom does not have to be permanent and many mommies choose to spend more time raising their children especially when they are little, and return to work when they get older.
All the best in your mommy journey regardless of which option you decide to take.